Chuck Norris Facts

If you spell Chuck Norris is scrabble,you win.forever. Chuck Norris can play Xbox live on a Sega Genesis. When playing Monopoly with Chuck Norris,you don't pass go,and you don't collect $200.You'll be lucky if you make it out alive. The Grim Reaper carries a scythe to protect himself from Chuck Norris.It won't work. A test group tested a new Chuck Norris game for Xbox kinect.Noone survived. Chuck Norris doesn't need a twitter.He's already following you. If a tree falls in the forest,does anyone hear it?Yes.Chuck Norris hears it.Chuck Norris can hear everything. Chuck Norris once walked in a minefield.Nothing happened. Lays chips claims noone can eat just 1.Wrong.Chuck Norris ate 1,laughed,then ate a whole bag of Doritos. Chuck Norris can not only smell your fear,but also detects your dread,panic,and abject horror. Chuck Norris.....actually,there isn't an app for that. Chuck Norris isn't politically correct.He's just correct.Always. Never forget to capitalize Chuck Norris' name.You'll end up as small,and bent as the letters you write. The 1st rule of Chuck Norris is:You don't talk about Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris has never received an electric bill.He powers everything with his rage. Chuck Norris doesn't read,he just stares at the book until he gets the information he wants. Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books,the words assemble themselves out of fear. Chuck Norris doesn't need oxygen tanks when scuba diving.He simply sucks all the life out of the ocean to breathe. Chuck Norris once starred in Wheel of Fortune.The last 29 minutes were spent in awkward silence waiting for the wheel to stop spinning. Chuck Norris killed his living room.It's now just "the room." Chuck Norris doesn't own a house.He walks into random houses,and people move. The A-Team is for people who can't afford Chuck Norris. Note to self:Don't be the cashier to tell Chuck Norris his coupons have expired. The best burglar alarm is a picture of Chuck Norris outside your front door. What time is it when Chuck Norris knocks on your door?Time to die.