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Monday, February 13, 2012

Things I'm Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts

#1:I won't poke Hufflepuffs with spoons nor will I insist that their house colors indicate "they're covered in bees."
#11:If a classmate falls asleep in class,I won't take advantage of that fact,and draw a Dark Mark on his arm.
#17:Seamus Finnigan isn't "after me Lucky Charms."
#42:42 isn't an acceptable answer to every question on the OWLs.
#45:"Springtime For Voldemort " isn't an acceptable suggestion for a class play.
#50:I won't take out a life insurance policy against Harry Potter.
#62:Gryffindor courage doesn't come in bottles labeled Firewhisky.
#64:1st years aren't to be fed to Fluffy.
#65:A wand is for magic only.It isn't used for picking noses,playing snooker,or drumming on desks,no matter how bored I become.
#69:1st years shouldn't be encouraged to befriend the Whomping Willow.
#80:I won't to use Slytherin,and Gryffindor 1st years as Christmas decorations.
#83:I'm not allowed out of my room when visitors from the Misistry are here.
#87:A time turner is not a Flux Capacitor,and I should therefore,not install 1 in any muggle cars.
#92:When being interrogated by a staff member,I'm not allowed to wave my hand,and say "these are not the droids you're looking for."
#107:I won't sing The Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin Quidditch matches.
#108:I won't tell 1st years they should build a tree house in the Whomping Willow.
#123:I will not dress up as Voldmort for Halloween.
#124:I'm not allowed to wear my DEATH EATER,AND PROUD OF IT shirt to school.
#127:I'm not allowed to introduce myself to 1st years as Tim the Enchanter.
#131:I will not steal Gryffindor's Sword from Dumbledore's office,and use it to patrol the hallways.
#135:I won't paint the house elves blue.
#139:I won't dress up in a Dementor suit,and use a dustbuster on Harry's lips to get him to do what I want.
#143:I won't sing "We're off to see the wizard," everytime I'm sent to the Headmasters office.
#148:I'm not King of the Potato People,and I don't have a flying carpet.
Appendix A:I won't dress up in a hood,walk up to Harry Potter,and claim to be his real father.
Appedix E:I'm not allowed to flood the Chamber of Secrets,put on 1/2 a mask,and sing Andrew Lloyd Weber.